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Funny one liners dating profiles

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I require nothing else but of course a fuck is never out of the question and if you enjoy it perhaps a more regular nsa arrangement would work This is a genuine offer from a horny housewife not a "working" girl in case that thought crosses your minds Unfortunately I cannot accomodate nor pay for hotel rooms mess me soon with a photo etc UPDATE: I have had tons of response and 2 proposals of marriage but the vast majority are from timewasters and people who think "phone me" is a viable response If you want me then you need to sell yourself to me otherwise you wont even get a response and stop suggesting I am not genuine because I am 100% and I want to suck cock that's all ! I'm a very attractive wife that's just been let loose to play on my own!

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Am very normal-but am looking for dom man who really enjoys giving a proper spanking,corner time-you have to be in to it,and enjoy giving them-am not lookig for sex-so please no emailing asking for it also hope to find fun person too if OZ or kiwi even better Bored married Mum of 3,and housewife with p/t job but dont get much time off to have fun!I'm confident and sexy and i know what turns a man on. i dont want an affair just sex now and again when i feel sexy and want to have some fun.i dont want guys to pester me for sex it has to be on my terms and time.....takers?I am looking for a cute guy - however I must tell you that I am married.If that is a problem for you - then please do not reply.My husband recently had an affair and and I so upset and angry that I have decieded to post on here I am in my early 40's attractive and looking for some dicrete fun ty..........I am a Frustrated housewife who loves sex but not getting enough lately......you remind me what i am missing.....?? not essential but would love to experiment with dom male who will help me explore.....

Well here it is I am happily married but I have a penchant for sucking cock and can't get enough of it at home I have a lot of free time during the day so if you can provide a venue I will happily give you the blow job of your dreams.

I am looking to hook up with guys (maybe more than one at the same time! ;) race is not important to me...after the same boring sex once a month i want to let my hair down and really enjoy the fruits life has to offer!

Mmmmmmmmmm Sexy older Milf seeks well endowed man/men :) Now lets see if there any gents out there who fancy taking me shopping today and getting a bit cosy in a changing room......

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You should be able to accommodate or be willing to cover the cost of daytime hotels.